Unix 2

Unix For the Win   

A Novel

Cast of characters

ONE

That's great, it starts with an earthquake, birds and snakes,
an aeroplane - Lenny Bruce is not afraid.
Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn,
world serves its own needs, dummy serve your own needs.

An earthquake of sorts a strong swimmer after a subtle glimmer in ones eye. Maybe it ends with an earthquake. But listen to yourself churn.

Wire in a fire, representing seven games, a government for hire and a combat site.

Uh oh, overflow, population, common food, but it'll do.
Save yourself, serve yourself. World serves its own needs, listen to your heart bleed dummy with the rapture and the revered and the right - right.
You vitriolic, patriotic, slam, fight, bright light, feeling pretty psyched.

It's the end of the world as we know it. (It's time I had some time alone)
It's the end of the world as we know it. (It's time I had some time alone)
It's the end of the world as we know it (It's time I had some time alone) and I feel fine.

The refrain in this song gets to him today as Seth walks across the fire lane contemplating today’s run and a return to a constant in life. The trail runs where rain trickled down the end of his nose and his ankle. He felt whole again and completely  ready to take on the world feeling drunk with endorphins but he remembers uncomfortably that it has been a struggle to sneak in this oasis part of his day that being a trail run. This run on a a fall day brought a near serenity to an already far too busy day.

A day where he had completed practically nothing to his choosing but he certainly got everything done as he did on a normal day, was a day which included the banal and somewhat comforting tasks of cleaning dirty dishes from the sink that had been somehow been left in the sink for the last 526 days since she had moved in. But it is this regular activity that is the glue tying one day to the next. To him there was certain finality in doing dishes and taking out the trash. For Seth, everything else was an ongoing project, with no beginning or end.

Seth had as always enjoyed his post workout buzz, as in earlier years the post workout hum usually consisted of a few cold beers but at this point in his life he was getting too old for that. He had real things to do and real places to get to but  he had always enjoyed the ride home from his run s in Forest Park and while crossing the Fremont bridge taking in a rare fall sunny day with a hint of a winter coming, This elevated sense of awareness  was now  fading into obscurity right now.

Seth sat back in his bed and enjoyed the sudden respite from his sudden need for change only to stray in his mind to his constant yearning to seek the change that he had warned himself that he needed. It was an enigmatic struggle for him between the never ending need for seeing and feeling things from a different point of view versus a chronic hankering to just get it right just this once. And Seth wavered in has steadfastness just like he always has.


He surprisingly nodded off into a deep, peaceful sleep and was alerted by a weird wrapping noise that he kind of recognized coming from the front door and he stumbled down the steps he was surprised that daylight was fading and the sun was reflecting at sharp angles indicating that is was later in the day then he had planned. He could not recognize the stranger at the door and thought to him self should I actually answer the door but he was left with no choice as the visitor was right behind the glass window ready to knock again. He opened the door slowly and said "How can I help in you" in as cheerful a voice as he could muster.

There on the front porch was young woman with a cheerful cautious smile and she had a leash in her hand and he followed the line of the leash it was obvious she had his dog on the leash and he worried to him self how exactly his dog of many years had ventured out of the yard he was sure that he had securely locked. He glanced at the gate and nothing seemed amiss and he glanced back at the girl on the porch and she was heading back toward the street as his dog stood on the porch panting and obviously happy.

She was walking away from him toward the street and noticed she was wearing a long flowing dress that seemed to summer like for this fall day and wanted to know where she had come from and why. She turned and looked at him and said “I am glad you have your dog back but I need to catch my bus”. Seth kind of in a daze responded with “Hey sorry about that my dog gets out often and I need to figure out how she got out but for now I am happy to have her back”.

She stood on the porch fumbling with the Beagles name tag she had just taken off so she could better read the well worn inscription stamped on the tag.  She responded through a half smile. “So am I “.

“Well thank you so very much for such a simple kind gesture. Thank you so very much hmmm…what is your name please you never told me”.

“Seth it doesn’t matter” she chuckled as she ran to catch her bus.

TWO

Buses and mass transit systems have a unique way of collecting an odd assortment of strange people and sometimes this was UNIX’s main reason for taking the bus. She had a perfectly acceptable Slug Bug of sorts that could get her from place to place and the gas wasn’t that all expensive but she hated to drive and she somehow loved the chance encounters that happened on the BUS.  Well to put it another way she liked chance encounters in general but lately she had become more of a hermit and these chance encounters were just that. She had a little weathered note book where she would write them down mostly for her enjoyment. She would add some crazy little sketches to help remember them and she thought someday she would gather them together and somebody might want to read them.

She sat on the bus headed across town and watched as the late autumn leaves swirled in the gusty winds   and she started to make a sketch of Seth and his dog. Her long brown hair curled around her lips as she tried to actually remember what Seth looked like. She certainly remembered the dog as it was a brown, black and white dog with the warmest brown eyes. It was funny to her that she could not remember the dogs name but she could remember Seth’s. (Both names were on the tag) She could also sketch the dog from memory but had very little re collection of Seth at all so when she sketched them both she sketched the dog in detail and drew Seth as a ghostlike character that resembled nothing even human like. The sketch amused her as she pushed her sketch book back into her book bag and as she looked out the slowly fogging windows she realized that she had badly missed her bus stop. She was not alone on the bus with an older lady who had a collection of bottles which it looked like she was taking to the grocery store for the 10 cent refunds. It looked like she had about four dollars worth of bottles in her bag. The lady wore a thread bare coat that was well worn at the sleeves and she seemed a bit agitated but other wise of this world.

“Hi there” she said to the lady “she thought to herself I have to stop just talking to strangers one of these days” but she had already committed to this conversation and continued. “Where are you headed with that fine collection of bottles?”  She had already somewhat known the answer but she still pushed forward and repeated the same question.   “Where are you headed with that fine collection of bottles”?
--
The lady looked at her with what she perceived as sardonic amusement and simply said “I am looking for a modern day Jesus and a bottle of cheap wine.”

You know what lady on most days I am looking for the exact same thing. I do not care for wine all that much but I think I understand what you are looking for.

The old lady chortled somewhat under her breath “You think you are so smart and understand what a lady of my means is looking for?”

Yes I do. Unix responded, “Some day’s I think I do. Here I got a simple little deal for you. It looks like you have about 40 bottles there and in my world that comes to about four dollars worth. I’ll buy all those bottles from you for 10 dollars and I’ll take care of them for you.”

“That’s mighty nice of you young lady I would be foolish not to take you up on that offer.”

With that Unix shuffled through her purse and found 10 one dollar bills and folded them and put them into the old lady’s surprisingly warm hands. The old lady smiled just a bit and thanked her.  “How can I thank you er ummm…I did not catch your name.”.

“It doesn’t matter but if you find your modern day Jesus it would make me very happy” as Unix left the bus about a mile past her destination.

THREE


Unix decided to walk the last 18 blocks back to what she called home for now and for the most part she loved the walk and the crisp autumn air, but something she could not touch was lurking in the back of her mind. She loved the view of the city from the bluff in Sellwood... The water sparkled bright a dazzling blue with the help of the sun and a wonderful crisp breeze as the city, with all its metal and noise sat in the background, she kind of took the long way home tonight savoring her lukewarm reflection of enjoying the first contact with a human being of any sorts for the last few weeks. She had become a conundrum of sorts at least to herself. Icy was at this point she was a little spooked that she was actually thinking about what she was thinking about. Her life had become a short term mess of sorts and she somehow rationalized that it was time to get out of this funk and get back to her basics and just meet people.

She has been mired in a funk of sorts for the first time in her young life

Life had always been handed to her throughout her childhood. She was the girl who got to go to the private schools and then ended up not following the rules and getting sent to public school. When that didn’t work out as planned she was almost forced by her parent to be sent to a military school and her parents gave in to her and let her prove herself at another high school that she all of a sudden found somewhat to her liking.  The school was big enough to provide structure but also perfectly big enough to afford her the freedom of being somewhat invisible. . The quirky bird at school that was always in her own little world but whom would somehow get her artwork on the schools west wing. It was that good , her art work somehow had made it on the walls of her high school, She readily admits  she had actually purposely flirted  with the her art teacher and somewhat mentor of sorts Mr.Mapes so that he would propose the idea to whom ever made that decision. But she really did not care as she wanted people to see her art and she felt proud every time she walked past art work I really do not need all this school work when I can happily paint to make people happy.

She was somewhat not entirely disconnected from her parents as a constant in her life. Her parents had suddenly split while she was in her senior year at Portland State. It was mystery to her how two people whom had always been together had drifted apart. It saddened her more than she would let on to but she still despite what she considered large odds she survived and graduated with relative ease. She could somehow put these little episodes in her life into tiny little compartments. Well so her counselor said.

She thought for a few seconds about the lady on the bus and in a subtle way it dawned on her that she could be that lady on the bus in 30 years or so. But she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

FOUR

Seth could not see this coming, but he had at some point completely lost interest in what he used to over indulge in, that being his job. Everything that once had existed in his job that he found interesting and challenging had been shipped overseas many years ago. He dreaded the never ending polishing of the terd that never seemed to get polished and somebody always ended up unhappy over. The things he did at work he felt a secretary pointed in the right direction could do and they would be probably like it 100 times more. And tomorrow he had a handful of meetings as well as his official one on one yearly review with his condescending boss. It was already getting dark on this the first day we turn the clocks back in the fall and the sudden earliness of the dark startled him and he realized his weekend was for all practical purposes over. This saddened him a bit but he decided he would take Beetle for a walk even though his dog had decided to go on her own little walk just a few minutes earlier.

Walking through his neighborhood made him feel like he belonged somewhere. He had lived in this house longer than anyplace he lived before and he has grown a certain liking to where he lived. The park in the neighborhood had large pine trees that indicated a park in the Rose City. The moon was a silver sliver that was racing toward the horizon rapidly on this tranquil fall night. The quiet was almost deafening tonight. Seth enjoyed this quiet as he left Beetle off her leash. Beetle looked quite content as she smelled what she was going to smell devouring almost every scent on a scentless night.  He sat on the park bench for awhile and watched a Black Lab and a weird looking pug join his beagle on the soccer field.  As he felt himself starting to relax and forget about tomorrow’s drudgery Seth had the distinct feeling that he was not alone and this was suddenly confirmed as he heard a females voice with almost a screaming whisper mouth the words “Rodger get over here” .

This startled Seth at first, but when the voice had fully entered his cognitive thought process he loved the sound of her voice.  It echoed brilliantly on this cool clear fall evening. In the four words he heard ““Rodger get over here”” he had picked up a foreign accent and something else he could not put his finger on.

He looked to his side and saw her in a pretty brilliant light considering how quickly the day had gotten dark.  Much to his surprise she walked over to the park bench he had been sitting on with looked like a bag which he presumed contained doggy cleanup in a public park.  The idea of a woman carrying a poop bag may be a symbolic metaphor for future failure to many but for Seth at this time in his life it brought this beautiful voice down a level to where he was comfortable and it also served to give him his voice.   .Which may or may not have been in his best interests today.

“Are you talking to the Dog” Seth weakly lobbed this non sentence into the night air.
“Are you talking to me” echoed the voice from the night air.

And Seth took in the voice and for some reason noticed the fog that came from her voice and essence. It was a real thing how that sentence hung in the crisp autumn air and a somewhat literal view as the heat from her voice actually emitted a shadow of sorts in the night air.  It hung in the air without tension. Actually it kind of sparkled.

Hi my name is Emily.  Sorry to have interrupted you on this fine evening I am just getting my dog and I will be out of here.

Seth reached out his right hand to shake hers but no handshake was even hinted from her.
“It’s no problem” he meekly replied.  “I know that it is dark but we have met before and I am pretty sure I know where”

You might recognize me as I sometimes tend bar in the little British pub on 42nd avenue,

“Yeah that’s certainly it” Seth replied.

Seth was a little bit secretly deflated as he would venture down to the Sixpence once in a while and certainly liked when she tended bar. She certainly was a girl he found rather attractive and she always seemed to know a little bit about soccer when he talked about it, Or so it seemed to him. It was certainly a pleasure seeing her out of context as he thought about why he liked to visit this liked this particular watering hole. She was certainly one of the reasons.

She clapped her hands a few times to get Rodger to come over to her but the gloves on her hands made the  clap basically ineffective so Seth offered a few gloveless claps of his own and the dog happily scurried between his feet. Seth tickled him between the ears and the dog quickly spotted its owner who promptly put his leash back on. In the mean time Beetle was doing her own little thing, being a beagle, and had disappeared into the dark of the night.

“Damn that Beetle is really pushing his luck today. Here we go again” Seth said as the useless leash hung from his right hand. He loved his dog but sometimes he questioned his decision as Beagles just can’t stop being Beagles as they blindly follow their noses.

Seth just stared into the cold fresh night air and he could sense her breathing and the air between then hung, well maybe lingered filled with low level electricity. Or maybe Seth had misperceived the moment and because he had to do something soon despite not wanting to leave this moment. He liked being in the here and now instead of his constant fear of the here and tomorrow.

Emily suddenly struck from the cold night air. “I do not have a plan but we should find your dog now”.

“Okay I will head over toward the swimming pool”, Seth dead panned.

And Seth sped out into the cool night air

“Okay I’ll search over near the school” Replied Emily in a less than enthusiastic voice as she was uncertain what she was getting herself into. Emily slowly walked with her dog toward the school as the park was somewhat lit by street lights and the low cloud cover seemed to illuminate the night. Whistling was never a skill that she had mastered but for some reason her whistle was much louder than she remembered. She circled the school a few times and there was no sign of the Dog for that matter there was no longer and sign of Seth either. She now called his name and once again there was no response. She was a bit confused as what to do next because she certainly wanted Seth to find his dog and she did want to know that Seth was coming back or if in fact he went home for the night as it was starting to get late. By instinct, She slowly took the cell phone out of her pocket but she realized it was futile as she had no contact of him. She and Rodger slowly walked the five blocks home all the while calling out Beetle’s name and of course no response was forthcoming.

Meanwhile Seth’s search for his ever illusive dog pretty much ran the same course. He actually ran around the neighborhood like it was his daily workout and he even stopped by his house and got on his bike and continued the search. His dog was fast and he kind of realized the attempt to find his dog would be futile so headed for home hoping that somebody found the dog and returned it to the address listed on the collar. He for a second doubted whether this information was actually on the collar but he did remember that this happening before and somebody always seemed to call him. His dog was kind of locally famous for being captured on the street and taken in for awhile until Seth could be contacted. Seth was hoping this night would end in a similar fashion and rather quickly b ut when he arrived home chilled from his running and later a bike ride he was simply cold. It felt like winter was moving in and there was no sign of his dog.

FIVE

The alarm woke Seth out of a fitful sleep of sorts and he rolled over and for once shot straight out of bed. The house seemed so much different with out Beetle in the house. She was usually right by the back door ready to make her rounds in the back yard when he had ventured into the kitchen. He checked his cell phone briefly for any messages from people who may have found his dog. The only thing on his phone was a text from his boss that said his early meeting had been moved back an hour. He certainly hated that his boss would contact him via text message but he was also happy for an hour reprieve on this cold foggy morning. It felt like snow today. He still felt like he had not shaken the cold from last night despite a long hot shower. When he rechecked his cell phone he also noticed that he was up way too early. Apparently he had not reset the clocks but of course his cell phone did that automatically for him. It was almost enough time to hop back into bed but he was wide awake on this particular morning so decided to tackle some chores just so he could relax after his dreaded day at work. He remember last night and he thought it would be a good idea to venture down to the British pub to at least see what had become of Emily.

He decided he was going to take out this weeks recycling so it did not have to be done tonight. He was somewhat embarrassed by the number of bottles of Ale that had accumulated this past week and at least if he set them out this morning the local homeless people could snatch them out of the bin and collect the dime deposit. He thought to himself some homeless person may have enough to but himself a fine bottle of wine or maybe even two bottles of the fortified stuff. He also lamented the fact that he was too lazy to actually take them to the store himself. “I guess it is my own little non tax deductable gift to the local community”. As he reached the front porch he looked down and then looked down again and there on the porch was Beetles collar but it had no name tag. He thought for awhile did somebody actually put the collar on the porch or had it fallen off when he stood on the porch with that girl who never gave her name. He really had no idea. He surmised the tag was in the bushes somewhere but a quick search revealed nothing.

Today already seemed like it was progressing in fog like quicksand like way, but unfortunately that was not to be said for the time. It was time to head to work and he got this massive pit in his stomach.

SIX

Unix was up and about a lot earlier than normal today but she was painfully aware of why that was. She had turned her clocks ahead last night. She was really happy in the home she had bought with the help of her parents as it had hardwood floors and a back yard that has plenty of wild foliage everywhere. She lived alone in a mostly family leaning neighborhood in Sellwood.  A calming electrical waterfall, she had bought on Craig’s made the yard feel like a jungle or sorts mostly in the summer time. But of course she loved the summers here as they were predictable and warm, but this morning was rather cold for her liking. She still found a perfect beauty in the way the fog surrounded her house on this particular morning.. Her two roommates, another Craig’s list find, were away for the week headed out of town, probably, for a alcohol filled snowshoeing trip down to Mt. Bachelor, and this allowed her to spread out and truly enjoy her passion in life.

She had called in sick for her morning appointment as she was in that mood again. She found herself laying out her well cleaned brushes in order of the width of the brush and her paints on a side table where she could see them. There was no need to put them in any particular order as she liked to paint with what ever color moved her. She could pull off a sky of crimson and bright pink even though it never happened in nature and it would come alive on canvas and would be her interpretation of her own little world. The tea kettle in the kitchen whistled and she moved to the kitchen and happily put together a pot of tea that warmed her and kept her moderately stimulated. Maybe it was the tea or maybe it was just the simple sound of the tea kettles whistle that made her put paint to canvas.

She painted at a frantic pace. She loved mixing the colors and blending the land to the water and loved filling in the details that made the clouds sparkle in a certain way, but for today she was in the mood to paint her much loved interpretations of the sky and the land. But for today she had a certain edge to her that had not been around for awhile. She was in the mood to paint real people who had entered her life. Maybe this was just an effort on her part to chronicle that she was breaking out of her abyss.

The last couple of weeks had been a struggle for her and today she seemed to be more like her self. She literally hadn’t talked to anybody in the last four weeks with the exception of the clerks at the local grocery store and the people at her so called job. Yes ironically her job as a clerk and customer service representative at a plumbing store over in the Hollywood district across town kept her minimal expenses paid and fulfilled one of her axioms in life. That axiom she held close to her basically said in her life there needed to be a true separation of her work life and her real life, Her clerk job at A Boy Plumbing served that purpose exactly. It was so unreal for her but also an anchor for her sanity. She worked in a mans world of technical questions about the correct amp rate needed for an extension cord needed to run an in house electrical source to other non technical question from the mostly male staff that as to the color of underwear she had she worn to work. It bordered on harassment but she really did not care as she had little connection to her co workers.  For the time being, she was perfectly capable of answering both questions with an equal amount of bullshit and bravado.  She worked to live not the other way around.

But of course she had called in sick today and she was attacking the canvas with more passion than she could remember as she painted the lady she had met on the bus the day before. She remembered somewhat the look in her eyes. She had the eyes of an owl and she painted the eyes of an owl. Her face was that which resembled the face of Mr. Ed. That is one thing she remembered is she looked a little bit like an older version of that girl who played in Sex in the City. She never ever remembered the names of famous people because they were not from her realm. She remembered the faces just not the names.      

She painted with passion. For some reason it was a passion that overtook her many times in her life but today she was passionate with the desire to create. Her room mate were gone and she decided subconsciously to take her pants off and just paint some more. She certainly didn’t want to stain her favorite jeans. She just wanted to paint. The rendition of the old lady on the bus took up most of the morning and well into mid afternoon but she only felt like she had worked on this painting for days.

She was a mess like she had always liked when she was painting. She could care less what was happening around her when she painted and she never really stopped to look at her work until days later. But today she actually walked to the refrigerator and opened a nice cold bottle of a local seasonal ale and she took a quiet minute to inspect her work. She didn’t care that much if she liked it but something inside her loved what she had painted.  She stood there in her long shirt and paint stained once white underwear looking at what she had painted. And she liked it even though it nothing at all looked like the Lady on the Bus. It was whom she wanted her to be.

She stood and looked some more and she was suddenly broken from her artistic spell as her home phone rang.and since she had an old fashioned lan line  she did not have the abilty to screen calls she picked up the phone with obvious cheer..

She picked it up and the voice on the other end said

“Hi there I have your dog”
She quickly sorted through her life and politely responded. With,  “I don’t have a dog”.
“I know because I have your dog”
The phone went blank.

The caller probably was not   being rude or melodramatic. As far as she knew it wasn’t a ransom phone call or anything. Her phone simply had not charged and for now she had no idea where her charger was. But she was pretty sure she didn’t have a dog

SEVEN

The train pulled into the station right at 5:23 like it had done on most of his commute’s home.  Seth took the long ride home on the Max train sitting next a family who was obviously from the suburbs or visiting from out state. Seth listened to them talk about how crowded the train was he could tell by their body language that they were out of their element. And for today the entire work day experience was out of his element. Seth used to write computer programs all day long and really enjoyed the creative freedom it afforded and he always like the idea of people coming to him to solve problems. But that part of his work had been out sources. He now spent most of his days preparing documents he could hand pseudo over to somebody from most likely from India so they could write the code to his specifications. He felt he could simply write the code and save the company some cash by avoiding this process. His career had come to that, as he had been taken out of work that he had always done and he had become quite adept at. He now wrote documents all day long.

He wrote these documents per the established time frame that his project manager had established. He then presented the paper back to the developers and his peers of his code so that could pick his analysis to pieces. He hated the process and today he failed at it miserably today. His analysis lacked detail when he presented it. Off course it did because he now lacked passion for the job that he did. But he still wore his heart on his sleeve and every presentation that did not go well tackled his confidence. It showed in his swagger as he excited Max train in the Hollywood district. He wanted so much to just walk the six blocks home and enter his empty house and sit and relax. He wanted to do nothing, and he wanted a lot nothing. He walked down 42nd Avenue with little conviction and on his right was the little British Pub that he liked so much. But as he approached, he had remembered Emily from the night before. He also remembered that Emily still worked there and she might just be working as he had never touched base with her last night. He also festered within himself. He remembered himself not quite making a great impression while having a real life opportunity to just sit with her outside the bar scene. He had always longed for this possibility but when it happened he remembered that he had become awestruck in her presence. HE BLEW IT.

But for the time being he had become a lucid rational human being. He was truly enjoying the walk from the train station. The air was crisp and cool and the dark was just that. It came way too early and it surprised him much like cold water on his face.

Seth simply wanted to go home so he walked the last two blocks with purpose.  He knew he should be at the Bar with insane reason, but he realized in the short term he some how had to get on his way with finding his dog. His Beagle named Beetle was always there when he got home from work and he internally rationalized that he did not want to put up with that emotion right now.  His head was spinning way too fast right now and for some reason out of his control he did a u turn and walked back to British Pub down the street.

He entered the pub with some trepidation as it suddenly dawned on him that Emily just might not be working right now. What would he do then?  Well forgetting that for now he walked through the bar and toward the tables on the back porch. It was a decent enough day where people might want to sit on the pub’s large and friendly deck.  Seth spotted Sonia whom he had talked to somewhat over the years but he did not know here well enough not skip being formal.

“Hey Sonia”, Seth over loudly yelled .

She replied despite Seth’s Terse tone., “Hello there, how can I help you”.

“Yes You can.

I have on real quick question, Is Emily working today.

Sonia replied crisply with a bit of sarcasm in her voice. “Yeah she works today but she doesn’t come in till around 730. Seth thought for a second and said. “Hey I lost my dog last night would it be okay to put a Lost Dog Notice up on the message board.

Yeah Go for it Dude. Just bring it around and we will get in on the bulletin board.  Emily had mentioned last night when I talked to her something about a lost dog but she seemed like she was really in a hurry.

Oh did she?  Sonia looked up with a knowing grin and kind of giggled in a way that made her sound and look a lot younger than she actually was. Do you two know each other? To which Seth responded sharply and with little emotion. Hey I come here quite a bit and I of course talk to her when I come in so in that sense yes I know her. I know she has a dog named Rodger so that how well I know her. Hey I am going to skip the beer for now but thanks you have been a big help. I am going to get home as I have a lot of things to do and I have sudden urge to do them.

Good Luck with that Seth, she said as she slowly walked toward another table and she gave another slight grin.

He looked down on the table in front of him and there sat a fully poured beer that looked like the beer he usually ordered. He could recognize his beer from all others as it was a deep chocolate color with a reddish brown foamy head that dripped ever so slightly from the pint glass. How many times had he seen this before? He felt a bit like Pavlov’s dog. He noticed a note next to it that been hand printed on a white coaster which a hand drawn beer sitting on top of a crudely drown house. Its on the house he mumbled to him self. That is kind of cute.

Seth did not think about who wrote the note, but he did what he thought was normal that being he sat down and started to unwind. The small note of kindness had suddenly elevated his mood for the day. He sat there and though how had been through a range of emotions today that were quite stunning to him upon reflection. Before he had sipped his beer the angst he toward his work had quickly disappeared and he felt somewhat giddy. But that was alos a part of Seth that he could not figure out about himself as since his break up with his ex-girl friend of seven years he noticed that his moods were sporadic and mostly based on what had happened to him last. Every day seemed like an emotional roller coaster. It was the reason he and Kendra has broken up. He could not take her magical mood swings. He had always heard that woman are just like that but he could not deal with not being able to predict of even how to control her mood swings. They had given up the relationship with not much of a fight as he guessed that was the mood of the day and she wanted to also move on. He literally had not talked to her at all after their rather unceremonious break up. But now he had become her and sitting there sipping his beer he understood her a little. Sometimes mood swings are not under the control of those who have them. Sometimes they can be dictated by what’s going on around them. For Kendra it must have been him that accelerated the mood swings. It had to have been. He was in Love one day and just going through the motions on others. It moderately frustrated him that he could connect the dots sitting here in the Moon and Sixpence and he could not do it seven months ago. Why did it matter today and not seven months ago?

EIGHT

Unix was tired and she for the first time in a long time the tiredness had felt good. She had spent the day exactly how she loved just putting paint to canvas and letting her self get lost in her day. Her house had grown somewhat cooler and she slipped on her tattered blue jeans. She noticed that her knickers had paint all over the fronts and sides from the various colors that she had been using. The pattern was pleasing to her eye and she decided to hang them on a hanger in her closet and she put on another old frumpy pair. She had mixed feelings as newly tie dyed pair was her favourite knickers the ones she pulled out of the wash as they were comfortable and she felt they made her look good. They made her feel pure and right with this world.

She sat on the sofa once again and pondered her situation. She concluded that she was happy to have painted today and she has another odd yearning that being just to talk to somebody. She had basically talked to herself all day long and could not remember if that was all in her head or something that she done out loud.

But where would she go tonight. She had recently lost contact with most of her friends and she had not been out for awhile so it did not come naturally for her.

So she did what she seems to always did. She just hadn’t done it in awhile, but by pure instinct, she picked up the phone and hit speed dollar to her friend Anthony. If there was ever a person who would drop everything at the drop of a hat it was certainly was Anthony. Anthony was a happy go lucky guy who had stayed in Portland after his family had all moved to Dallas Texas, where their family mostly lived. Anthony stayed behind to continue his education at a prestigious school that had an excellent program in Hotel Management.  But Anthony also worked at a local hotel chain as a jack of all trades. If Anthony could get the time off he would be a good bet to lead a good time and was the most unlikely to try to get her into the sack. That was always what had always comforted her, but lately that was not all that important to her. She wanted a simple night out and she suddenly was somewhat saddened that she really did not have a female friend that she could go out with.

She picked up her old Kelly green telephone and looked up Anthony’s  phone number and hit the proper keys to dial his number.

Anthony picked up the his cell phone on the very first ring and had to talk quietly as he was checking out in the Grocery Outlet and as she listened in the background to the clerk counting out change in some cryptic way and she heard Anthony say meet you up on Freemont in 90 minutes and we will decide what to from there. Got to run, he said and she she sat on the bed and thought about not having much say in the matter but she was happy to get out and just be with people tonight.

Her plans with Anthony were vague to say the least but,” so what”, she said to herself. As she was so intent on getting herself out into the world  and doing something,  She also remembered that she could not really make it a late night as she really had to make it into work tomorrow at 9:30 having missed all of today’s work day. She thought to herself all the time that this economy for the rich and well to do had made every body worry about their job everyday. She had done the semi homeless scene and she knew she was a few meager paychecks away from doing the homeless scene again. She didn’t relish that thought at all. Nobody that she knew now really knew about that part of her. But then again she wondered who she really knew.

She took the city bus as she always did and she briefly looked a round for the old lady who was looking for her own personal Jesus. She was surprised the cast of characters on the bus tonight were either the urban trendy types with oversized wooden glasses or professional looking people who looked liked they had mostly worked late and were happy and resigned to be on their way home. As they ascended the hill on 42nd.avenue and were ready to make the turn on to Fremont she spotted Anthony headed to the bus stop. Anthony entered the bus absently and fumbled with his bus pass and settle into the seat in front of her. She thought to herself why can’t he walk the last five blocks. No wonder he seemed to putting on weight.

She kind of pincher herself and made a mental note that she was determined to be less critical of other people.

She was somewhat annoyed but thought she would play the perky card and she tapped toed him on the shoulder and whispered. “Hey there Bus Pass Man, are you headed my way.”  

Oh hey that’s funny Anthony blushed funny meeting you here I was just headed to a buddy’s house and then I was going to meet you and damn you are already here.

Hey why don’t we walk over to my buddies house and them lets grab a beer at the speak easy down the street. Anthony kind of rambled his words and looked skyward as he just made it up on a whim. That’s kind of how Anthony rolled, living for the moment but sincere in every moment he lived.

Unix didn’t initially like the idea of heading to a strangers house, but she was still on was a bit of a high from today’s panting sessions that she simply replied, “Sure Why Not”. She and Anthony walked of the bus up near 46th and proceeded with horse play punching each other in the arm and doing fist bumps as that is what either of the knew. They enjoyed each others company but they liked the convenience of this formality as it provided distance. They strolled three blocks down 46th and Anthony veered left at a small bungalow that was surrounded by many tall pine trees. The trees dwarfed the house making it appear like a house with in a forest. It was out of place and somewhat hidden. While walking to the front door she noticed the curtains were old beach towels and she only noticed this because the lights behind then seemed so bright.

Anthony stopped suddenly and said to her “I am just going to run in quickly and say hello and take care of some quick business, Ill be right back out.”

Anthony I want to go in also and meet your friends.

He looked at her and with a bit of a what one describe as puppy dog eyes, cocked his head to the right and said, “No You Don’t’.

NINE

Seth never noticed how the time had gotten away from him. He had sat on his own little picnic bench on the deck of the Moon and SixPence and twittered away the last few hours. He had not intended this for the night but it really suited his mood. He drank his beers rather slowly and having one free one in his belly made him think that he could have spent the night in a worse way. He had grabbed a Willamette week and just sat there and read like he enjoyed it, He took in its political articles and its un-canny take on the new owner of the local soccer team. He was happy to live in a town that embraced soccer the way it does. It was getting close to nine o’clock and he really had to walk the two blocks home and get some real things done. But as he was getting up he noticed that Emily was now waiting tables and she did not seem to notice that he was sitting there reading. Then again how should she have had, as had spent most of the night absorbed in his reading.

He looked up and course he recognized her as a waitress at the bar tonight as opposed to the girl in park last night. For the time being to him they seem liked two different people in two different worlds. She wore her customary faded blues jeans and white turtle neck that seemed to serve as the perfect top when moving from the inside bar area to out door seating space. She looked a little more tired than usual but as she walked by he looked up and said said “hey there stranger”. She smiled at first and then recognized him from last night and sat down next to him with a hurried look in her eyes and face. Her job never afforded the luxury of sitting down with the patrons but Monday’s where a slow night and they probably had some business about a dog to discuss.

Hey what happened to you last night as we got separated and never found each other? As Emily spoke she looked out of the corner of her eyes seeing if any customers needed her attention but all seemed pretty quiet tonight. Seth kind of retraced her same path of vision seeing what she could possibly to seeing just to gage how much of his attention she actually was capable of but he got no real indicator.

“No sign of the beagle last night and I still have not found her, but of course I am more than curious if you had any sign of her”.  As he finished his sentence he realized that she did no sign of the dog or she would not have asked the previous question and she would have told him she had found Beetle. His heart sank for a moment and he thought to himself that himself all of a sudden as to why he was so delusional and had not taken the most obvious route that being calling all the veterinarians and rescues in the area but of course he was in the middle of a lot of self doubt. Here has talking to a woman he had admired with the crutch of a proper pint and then again last night as her voice resonated in the autumn air. But still he somehow found his true voice to speak in pretty much the same autumn air as last night only it was on the deck of a British Pun right down the street from his house.

Seth, that is your name right?  She said in such bad grammar without a hint of sarcasm.

And he responded dryly and with more pomp and circumstance than the moment required as he reached out to feebly shake her hand. A handshake with out conviction but it was as good as it was going to get as he once again was in awe of her or something. “Very Nice to meet you.”

He looked at her awkwardly and then looked at himself a little more awkwardly as he realized that he had probably had a little more beer than the situation warranted especially since he had somehow skipped dinner all together.

“Sorry about my communication snafu. We just headed off in different directions and in our haste we never made a plan to get back together”.

Yeah I usually have to be in here by nine on most nights and Sunday night was not exception. Yu probably have found your dog by now and if you have not you probably have figured out that I did not see it.  Emily felt almost detached to herself when she said these words as she literally found nothing and had very little information. But as she looked at him she actually thought he would be sadder and from this scant information she nay had internally decided that he had probably found his dog.

Seth with much emotion at all replied “Nope no sign of her on this side, Did you have any sign at all of her.

No, Not really. Are you sad? Have you started making phone calls.

No Not Really.   








TEN  

“What the hell is that outside going through our trash cans right now? You would have thought the city would have taken care of that.” Mujibar was slowly getting used to life in the United States. The houses were so much bigger and more available than in his native India, But he still had not got used to how life in the states was so much different. Even in this upscale somewhat quirky neighborhood in his adopted home town he did not feel at peace. Tonight was no different than most despite other than the rock hard fact that somebody or something was banging his trash can around.

When he first moved to the United States he read some articles predictably on-line about how the culture of the United States as collected whole simply loved their guns. He simply wanted to be like an American and own a gun himself. It was an absolute leap of faith for him.. Mujibar still did his due diligence and one day back in late July he decided to take the tests and he became a regular hand gun owner,

Next door David Cabot had a hard time believing the world around him. He had been semi deep into depression and some of the truths around him he interpreted as illusion. He simply did not trust himself. Today as an anchor to reality he had decided to attend a Bikram Yoga class. His back had been bugging him for awhile and usually the routine of sweating profusely cleansed him in a way that was somewhat unique. It ran counter to his logic how something so sweaty and exhausting could be so cleansing and cathartic. He was saoking wet like he had emerged from a thunderstorm, as he walked the three blocks home to his house that he shared with his wife Marta. They had lived on the Alemeda ridge for the last seven years and for Marta it had become a life of relative happiness that had become a sonstant of missed communications that onlt seemed to be getting worse. It frustrated her to no living end but David always seemed to be living in his own private reality.

David even admitted this to himself. The last word he would use to describe himself would be normal, but for today he seemed somewhat on top of his game. Post yoga usually did this to him as did the the evening shy. On certain day he loved looking at the evening sky. From the the Alamedia ridge the sunsets where usually fantastic with the City and Forest Park as a back drop. He loved seeing the the stars appear on at a time on nights like this. Despite this, the constant nagging anxity seemed to be a constant for him. In his world the symptoms were nearly impossible to pinpoint and the only way to describe them were to make up new phrased in his that he wrote down in his journal. He struggled as what he described as electrical sensations that migrated through out his body and he had a weird sense that his words were alive.

David has been in and out of counseling and each counselor eventually concluded that they could do little for David.   His prognosis was not specific at and at times to him he felt like he was crumbling around the seams and at other times he felt like he was in the early stages of a crazy divorce or the side effects of one. But today he did not fell all that crazy and he felt he had a firm grasp on reality. If he had to describe himself today it was perky and when these moods came along he preferred to run with them.

He ran into his wife Marta as she walked down the steps toward the kitchen. He noted to himself that she looked quite pretty today, as she she was all pig tails and short sexy dress, but of course he never actually took the time to tell her that.  He liked when she wore pigtails which were all the rage these days and the short dress showcased her still athletic legs. He always thought she looked good in everything and she looked especially good today. 

"Hey what would you like to have for dinner as I am kind of famished?. He said to her in a playful and teasing manner.

"What are you doing out there in the garage. There is so much banging and noise and I thought you were out there working".

"Nope I just got out here I just got back from Yoga and I still have not changed".  David chimed in almost off cue.

"What is with all the banging out here it sounds like animals in the garage?" She asked without.inflection.

"Yeah it is probably the big bad coyotee the news stations keep warning about"